Helping Men and Boys Navigate These Changing Times
Image: Morley Pirt (1896-1948) mink fur farmer and son Robert (1922). Winnipeg, Manitoba Collection / Public Domain
A conversation with Tyler Schueffner, LPC-IT
This post is part one of a two-part series.
During this time of upheaval in our society, when traditionally stabilizing forces are crumbling, not only institutions, but the roles of men and women also undergo changes. Caught between old ways of being and knowing and before new institutions arise to replace the old order, individuals suffer.
Mental health statistics tell us boys and men are currently experiencing higher levels of distress than women and girls.[i] For the men in my life, and as a writer, I wanted to understand why. To delve deeper into methods of care and repair around issues of manhood and masculinity, I’ve asked Tyler Schueffner, LPC-IT, to discuss his uniquely varied and depth approach to working with men and boys, especially those from working class and marginalized communities.
Tyler is a trauma-informed, existentially grounded therapist based in Madison, WI. After working with at-risk youth and men for years, he currently provides mental health services to older adults (60+) at Newbridge Madison. He is also building a private practice with a clinical focus on wellness for working-class men.
I was introduced to Tyler through my daughter Jessie, whose own visionary work involves working with populations at risk.[ii]
Dale Kushner: How do you think growing up in a blue-collar family in Wisconsin has influenced your work as a therapist?
Tyler Schueffner: Coming from a working-class background brings a relational depth often missing in clinical settings. While therapeutic training emphasizes bias awareness, it frequently overlooks the marginalization of blue-collar communities. Many clients I see have expressed feeling judged by past therapists. Repairing this rupture and offering therapy that is accessible, respectful, and grounded in lived experience—not professional pretense—is foundational. I’m not trying to be an expert; I aim to connect. Like my brother’s work restoring classic cars, my work is about uncovering beauty beneath life’s wear and tear—meeting clients emotionally, culturally, and acknowledging their pragmatic wisdom forged through physical hardship and struggle.
DK: What are the major issues you see men and boys struggling with today? How has this changed over the last decade?
TS: That’s a powerful question, one I approach with humility and urgency. While we try to dismantle patriarchy, it’s important to be mindful of how patriarchy harms men—fueling disconnection, shame, and emotional suppression. This isn’t to center men in a conversation about structural inequality, but rather to humanize their experience in a culture that’s shifting rapidly, often without the support, language, nuance, or mentorship needed to navigate it.
Many men aren’t seeking dominance; they’re seeking purpose, belonging, and permission to feel. Cultural messages like “man up” and “don’t be soft” have shaped identity and silenced vulnerability. Without guidance or spaces for honest reflection, men risk emotional orphaning. We must stop pathologizing masculinity and instead foster spaces where men can grieve, reflect, and grow with integrity. Healing begins not with blame, but with listening, accountability, and human connection.
DK: What societal forces do you see as contributing to the mental health issues of boys and men at the current time?
TS: We seem to be living in a state of collective amnesia—driven by technology, consumerism, and the ambitions of modernity, yet disconnected from our biological need for connection, humility, and balance. The pace and values of society are misaligned with our nervous systems, leading to feelings of hostility, withdrawal, and being overwhelmed, particularly among young men. What role and responsibilities does an individual have in a globalized culture? As existential fears mount, our bodies signal distress, even if our minds deny it. Like passengers on the Titanic, we sense the crisis approaching, yet our leaders often avoid grief and humility, choosing blame over the deeper work of healing.
DK: You work with marginalized populations, including homeless and at-risk youth. How have your approaches to therapy helped these populations?
TS: Before becoming a therapist, I spent nearly twenty years doing street-based outreach with homeless and at-risk youth—meeting them not in offices, but in parks, shelters, jails, and hospitals. Few people appreciate the skills these kids had to build to survive on their own. This work shaped my clinical approach profoundly. Resources were often scarce, so the most powerful tool I had was my presence. I learned that true support lies in helping people reconnect with their values and hope, especially during their most painful moments. As Maya Angelou said, people never forget how you made them feel. Therapy, like outreach, isn’t about fixing—it’s about showing up fully, with care, clarity, and a well-tended inner life.[iii]
DK: What are three important things we need to know about the mental health of youth today?
Youth are more sensitive because their nervous systems are developing in an overstimulated world that we adults perpetuate. For our children to be healthier, we need to examine our own habits, values, and participation in the chaos.
Kids learn through risk taking, and the safety that we (adults) provide them. Some live in perpetual fear and isolation, while others live with little to no boundaries. Both induce profound symptoms of anxiety which have huge consequences for society.
The youth of today have access to and are frequently exposed to things that their intellectual and developmental systems are not prepared to handle. PTSD and neurodivergent symptoms are being expressed due to anticipatory stressors or perpetually activated nervous systems. Society marginalized the idea of PTSD among soldiers until recently. Bear in mind that most soldiers who experience the trauma of combat are 18-30 years old and still developing.
School shootings, random acts of mass violence, reactive rage-filled leaders, famine, disease, extreme weather, near constant stimulation, and vastly compromised privacy is profoundly affecting all of us, but in particular the nervous systems of youth. The new norm is over-stimulation and dysregulation, and our cultural responses to these “reactions” is and has been punishment and shame. Our youth are demonstrating an immense amount of resilience and perseverance, considering the world they are inheriting from us. My concerns at this time are focused on the adults who seem to be rejecting our role as stewards of the earth.
[i] “Boys and men are increasingly lonely, and at higher risk of suicide and ‘deaths of despair’,” American Institute for Boys and Men, 2025.
[ii] “Transforming Conflict Through a Restorative Framework: A conversation with conflict specialist Jessie Kushner,” Psychology Today, December 20, 2020.
[iii] Make Room for Youth,” A short film about youth homelessness in Madison, WI, produced, filmed, and edited by Will Nimmow. 2013
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